What is Victim Blaming?

The Challenges Survivors of Sexual Assault Face

Sadly, survivors of sexual assault are commonly and unjustly blamed for causing their attacks. While the #MeToo movement has been instrumental in spreading awareness about the prevalence of sexual assault and abuse, victim blaming is still very much a problem. When you are trusted, and a friend or family member confides in you about their experience with sexual assault, it’s critical to show them support and empathy. Here’s how to lend support to a loved one who is a sexual assault survivor.

Victim Blaming Statements

Many people don’t realize that sometimes they say victim blaming statements. Here’s what NOT to say to a sexual assault survivor:

What were you wearing?
Why did you get in their car?
What did you think would happen?
What were you thinking?
Were you drinking alcohol?
Why are you only talking about this now?
Why didn’t you fight back?
Did you call for help?
Why didn’t you contact the authorities?
Why did you go back to their apartment?

No matter what a person is wearing, if they are drinking alcohol or don’t speak up right away, it’s never the victim’s fault, and no one deserves to be sexually assaulted for any reason. Read on to learn how you can show your care and support for a loved one who is a survivor.

Showing Support for Survivors

A survivor who tells their story to you in confidence means that they trust that you will listen, support them, and be discreet. Never tell anyone else about their experience unless they permit you, as their sexual assault experience is only theirs to tell. When listening to a survivor, let them tell their story without judgment or interruption. Showing them you believe them and care can help them through their healing journey. Here are some things you can say to offer your support:

I believe you.
What happened to you wasn’t your fault.
You didn’t do anything wrong.
You didn’t deserve what happened to you.
I am here for you.
Thank you for telling me your story.
You are brave for speaking out.

When You Need Help After Sexual Assault

Survivors of sexual assault have many fears about calling out their perpetrators. There are various reasons why they choose to remain silent — such as fear of victim blaming or shame about what happened to them.

Know that the sexual assault you endured was not your fault, and we believe you.

Our team offers compassionate and trauma-informed representation to sexual abuse survivors. When you are ready to speak out against your perpetrator, we are here to lend you support and guidance.

Contact } at (303) 835-9227 to receive a free and confidential consultation with a compassionate legal advocate.